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001C98C6 Gossamer Small Brother--Sny, sis, can I hong up one of your stockings Christmas' Big Sister--What on earth do you wont to hang up one of mine for? Small Brother--So's I can see what is in it without getting out of bed. January 17, 1930. Whimsical &Review ~ Mother (to small son staring at ccake): "AVhat's the matter vrith that cake?" Small Son: "Oh, nothing; I was just thinkin', ma, if a piece of it would be worth a licking." What Counts Here's heal th to the grirl who can dance like o dream, And the girli who can i pound the piano; ~ A health to the girl who writes verse'y the ream Or top with high C in soprano; To the girl vrho can talk and the girl who does not; To the saint and the sweet little sinner; But here's to the cleverest girl of the lot- The girl who can cook o good dinner. Doctor, IVas Satisfied Sam i Spiegeleiseni had been ailing for months. He had seen many doctors but-none could tell him what vras the matter. Finally he went to see o" specialist who gave him a thorougli 'xaminationond asked him to call the next day for his report. . "I'm sorry, Spiegeleisen," said the tor, when Som vrent back. ",You'e n s very serious condition. 1'm efreidiIi I'l have to operate on you." ! "Operate!" gasped) Sam. "AVhy I ~ haven't any money for operations. I'rn only n poor vrorking man." "You'ave i life insurance, i haven' you?" "Yes, but that isn't paid until after"; dead." "Oh," soidl the doctor, consolingly, hat'll be all right." Teacher--"Tommy, 1 use i the, vrord ~I notwithstanding in a sentence." Tommy--"Father wore his trousers out, but not with standing." AVhot a Chance! "Nurse," said the amorous patient, "I'm in love with you. I'on',want to get,well." "Cheer up, you won'" she assured him. "The doctor's in& love. with» mc, too, and he savr you kiss me this morn- 1n The Only 'hance "Why don't the i men vrant their wives in Lodge'" "Oh; n man likes to feel important oiice in a while." r A versatile real estate salesman of ,t West Texas hod just finished describ- ing the glorious opportunities of that II) portion of the cpuntry to a i prospect in the East. "All Vi'est Texas needs," ho said, "To become the garden spot of i the world is 'ood people nnd"'ater.""Huh!" replied'he prospect, "That's all Hell needs." I'lice:"How 3 many students are ere at your college?" Geo6'rey: "Oh, about one in every ten. DIVAS IT YOU? Someone started, the whole l dny ~vrong--'iVos it you? Someone robbed the'ay of its 'song:Wns it you? Eerly this inornini, someone frowned; someone sulked, until others scowled, nnd some harsh ivords were (passed I~i oi ound--Wos it you? Someone stort- li efi the doy right--4Vas it you? Som.,- II.one made it happy ond bright--Wns it: you? Early l this ( morning, we i are to]d, someone smiled, nnd through th ~ dity this smile encouraged young ondiI o!c!--Wns it you? A little more smile, n little i less roivn, n 1! ttle less kicking n mnn when he's down. A little more "we," a litt'.c less "I," o little, mo e lnugh, o little less cry. A 1:ttle more flowers on the pathway ) of life, ond fewer on the groves at tho end of thc strife.--Ex- change. Tax WEST VAN NEWS 'LASSIFIED A'DS-iVINTER ON 'OLLYBURN The woodland wilderness that crowns the Ridge is now a'land of silent beauty, a land of glitter- ing days arid placid starry nights of scenes, of splendour that are at once the poet's inspiration and the artist's despair. - The transformation from aut- umn's yellow loveliness is quite complete and the Ridge sleeps in gilded austerity, severe yet ser- ene. The dying of a blue and silver clay is epic on Hollyburn, the last '~iraysiof a lingering winter sun cast an evanescent radiance over mountain, forest and sea, the hollows are pale blue, the nearer, sharply defined shadows oi the eeclars are pure cobalt. Eiigh above the Island gray clouds "scarves of cobweb lawn" catch the glow of the setting sun and turn the western sky into a vivid vision of pageantry. Pile upon pile, beneath the thin- drawn cirrus lie huge banks of cumuli, pui~le and gray, riven and piercecl here and 'here with ruby ancl topaz, while over all the darkening blue vault reaches down to the horizon to mingle in ever changing tints of beryl, em- erald and palest pr.imrose. T~vo thousancl feet below, the sea,calm, yet pulsing and sensu- ous, Ilies&like an opalescent silk sheet, tremulous then still, re- fiectingfeach painted change of the dying day. Swiftly. following ithe setting sun I night i draws a mantle'ver the zenith, the warm glow fades from, the columned ctrees, the depth of Cypress i Canyon is a violet gulf, the only sound!its stream murmuring against pris- oning - ice. In the deep reaches above, cut steel on velvet, the march of con- stellations is out,= flashing f'l through)thei frosty air onto the Nereiad mists that rise from the sea, aerial Aphrodites in ghostly saraband.'he distant peaks form-notch- ed silhouettes against the east- rn sky asithe~moonibreaks in& ilver radiancet from a'ed )of , oolly i cloud and, as ~ by magic,. »e whole forest becomes a scin- illant fairy land. ~ 'From. the edge of the snowy plateauhVancouver is ethereal in~ a sequinned'haze of pearly tulle, ".white trying to be blue.",Voices hushecl i by distance 'ome down) the trail. The ',i last i ski-ers "are ) goinghome. . -- P.H. FOUNDATIOiN CE&IE'AT AVORK- 'Londscaping ond Lawns laid Rock walls drains septic tanks fencing ond land clearing. Phone T. Barnott residence phone, West 290R. ROLLER SKATING to i the 'une of the pipes at the Hollyburn Pavi1ion. BOY,16--.Wants work after school and ' on Saturdays. Phone West 380L2. ci:Wr.+.; NURSING--Experienced, Sick Child- ren'sss Toronto, Thessalon, Ont., Ross- land, B.C., Trail, B.C. Hospital. Miss Humphreys, Phone West 252R. FOR DRESSAIAKING AND SEWIiNG apply 2791 Marine Drive or phone EVest 74Rl. s e FOR RENT--Four Roomed Suite, hot water heated, 16th and Marine Drive Phone West 359R. itkI'Oli SALE--Two Waterfront Lots in'ollyburn, 107 foot frontage by 250 feet on corner. 1Vhat offers. 'K. W. Savory. Phone 4vest 3-$0. WANTED -- Land Clear ing; Wood Savring vrith machine. Large or small jobs. J. Glover. I Phone IVest 214R. GARDENS DESIGNED, Laid Out and iMaintained, Rock Gardens, Lily nnd Ornamental Pools. Lawns. Rustic EVork, Fencinge Concret" Paths,"Drives. etc., Pruning and Spraying Landscape and General Gardening.-'R. J. Kyte. Phone West 411.. PAINTING, DECORATIiNG,FRENCH Polishing, Carley, Phone West 71r HK&ISTITGEIING--Plain white 5c yard; silk and i colored 10c yard Pcarce's Drygoods, 14th Street and marine. Phone West 144. I; I'IANOFORTE--illiss Frame gives careful instruction. 26th and Mar- --, ine. Phone %'est 457L3. FOR PLUIIBING REPAIRS--Phone AVest 24-1R. Councillor R. I"iddes -'irunning for. Reeve SCHWEPPES LEMONADE, CAN- ADA DRY GINGERALE and all the Good Brands of Cigars at The Ambleside Tea Rooms. WEBB'S SHOE REPAIRS iVEAR , BEST--Dundarave. GEO. HAY "Real Estate and'Insurance Notary Public Fire Insurance -- baloney to Loan II)PHONE %VEST 21 I 1405 Marine Drive , Office Phone West 21 or Sey. 1260 Residence Phone W. 32R or W. 204X I i R. P. CLARK 4 CO. ESTATES LTD. SACRIFICE SNAP--$250 Cash: Bal- ance same as rent at $25 monthly. ~lodernte size [home, 2 l bedrooms, kitchen, living room with fireplace, full plumbing, concrete foundation, large lot. Tvrn blocks from Marine Drive on paved street. Full price $ 1750. R. P. CLARK 8: CO. ESTATES LTD. 790 Dunsmuir St. Seymour 7484 Local Representative C. J. ARCHER, West 225.LESS RA IN, LESS STATIC IN &1930, EASTERN = ASTRONOilIERS PREDICT Two of Canada's leading ast- 'onomers.have agreed Ithat the year 1930 will see greatly im- : proved radio reception, 'lighter rainfall, and fewer electrical storms=,-- all due to a'diminution ,; in the 'strength of ultra-violet rays from -'he sun; Reduced crops and greater danger 'from forest fires are also involved. Dr.'Ralph E. De 'Lurv of th~ Dominion t Obsess atory so pro- ;,phesied at Ottawa, and Clarence A. Chant. voted professor of ast- Iironomy at the University of Tor- onto, unhesitatingly endorsed the view. Ultra-violet racliation is strong: est.when sunspots are larges and most frequent. The eleven-~'ear cvcle for sunspots reached its peak in 1928. '-And this year should iI be the first, to show marked effect. "I think observations bear Dr. De*Lury out," said 'Professor Chant, "but in order to be posi: tive on these matters it requires some further observations. It I)~hasIbeen stated that radio was invented't a i time when sun- spots were few, and that was one reason'iwhy it,was such a great success, and it is'be)ieved that in the neat few years radio re- ception will improve again." He agreed ivith Dr.'De Lury's expectations of reduced rainfall. "But the actual amount of dif- ference," he qualified, "is inot very great." TRADE YOUR HOUSE On Blain Highvh ay to Chiiliwack: Corner Store, Gas Station, 6 room" house (not quite finished), good barn and poultry houses, on o acres choice land, all under cultivation. Price is $4,000 on easy terms or, will accept good four or five room mod- ern house in West Vancouver. 40 ACRES UNCLEARED -- (Light growth) facing on Huntingdon Road Alderg rove. Taxes only $ 18.00.Trade for Summer Cottage or good building site in West Vancouver. ii'W.'. SUT1'Oeb, West 53R'3 GILI ESPIE, HART f- CO.= =-., (Vancouver) LTD. ~ 456 Howe Street. Sennour 9380 PiIO RITA AT~ THEATRE LONSDALE AVest Vancouver citizens, this is one of l those rare occasions when we can cali to your atten- tion a motion picture & without fear that there may be some to whose individual tastes it is not suited. '"9re have seen "Rio Rita" and found in it such a wealth of en- tertainment we recommencl i it without the slightest reserva- Ii t.'on. There are hilarious laughs , deep 'heart interest, rich and spectacular beauty thrills and tlie. most gorgeous music yet heard from the screen. "The, picture of the century--the i eighth ivonder of the world." Don't miss "Rio Rita." Very truly yours -- EVILL HARPER, ilIanager. Councillor R. M. Blair running for 'Re-Election to,.the 0 Council i& I}) s Ii t e. Iv )l Chairman, G. D: Eigar ~&of the SehoolaBoai.d 1'unning for Councillor "s e +,~ o Ass For All Kinds of Job Printing Phone North 53 Saorx~vEi: RcI.shi i% vaiTcii. LTn.. Varxwaas. Noirr i v~icouvma. 'lE. S. Gamage Running for School Trustee. -"Nrks/j A. Harvey Smith running for School Trustee. Gsrammor Needed Lady of House--No! IVc don't wont no books, nor wc don't dont no colen- dors. Wc don't want no nothing. Hawker--What about n cheap grollllrlnr . GOOD PRIZES Admission 50c Election Results ii ill be announced. Refreshn&ents iilCOu Ve WHIST'D)KXVE The first of a series of,st SStlli'C1$+,IISN. X Steal at 8.1.5 shagy