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001C950F May 4, 1928. THE EVEST VAN NE4VS Whimsical Review Hc--"You see, we'vc gone into truck farming." Visitor--"You can't fool me, you don't raise trucks, they come from s factory." Salesman: "How much is Bill Jones good forv" Credit hfan: "Does he own an auto- mobile 7" Salesman: "No." Credit hfan: "Let him have all hc wants." "Her niece is rather good looking. eh'" "Don't say 'knees is," say 'knees are.' "hfighty mean man I's wukkin fer." "What's de mattahT" "Took de laigs off de w'eelbarruh, so's I kain't set it down an'est." The bfastcr (to his servant): "I told you to put my coat in the sun to dry. Ilave you done soT" "Yes, sir." "And has the dampness gone T" "I don't know; the coat has gone." Friendly German (to waiter) --"Wic gehts 7" Waiter--"One order of wheat cakes." German--'Nein, nein!" Waiter--"Nine? Boy, you sure are hungry!" hfistress to Maid: "Haven't we al- ways treated you like one of the fam- ily v" hfaid: "Yes, and I'm not going to stand it any more." "A shockin'oward my hus- band is. I was telling 'im off proper outside th'ublic library, when off 'e run inside an'tood near one o'hem 'Silence'otic- es." Prescription A prominent city man, who is as mean as he is wealthy, relates an English paper, is fond of get- ting advice for nothing. Meet- ing his doctor one day, he said to him: "I'm on my way home, doctor, and I feel very seedy and worn-out generally. What ought I to take?" "A taxi!" was the curt reply. A LAUGH OR 'AVO The Seattle Post-Intelligencer has this little geography lesson that might be useful to the young and old folk of British Columbia: waitress--Hawaii, gentlemen. Youse must be Hungary to eat in a dump like this. First Man--Yes, Siam. And we can't Rumania long, either. Venice lunch ready? Waitress--I'l Russia to a table. IVill you Havana? F. M.--Nome. You can wait on us. waitress--Good. Japan the menu yet? The Turkey is Nice. F. II.--Anything at all. But can't Jamaica little speed? . )Vaitress--I don't think we can Fiji that fast, but Alaska. F. M.--Never mind asking anyone. Just put a Cuba sugar in our Java. waitress--Sweden it yourself. I'm only here to Servia. F. AI.--Denmark our bill and call the Bosphorus. He'l prob- ably Kenya. I don't Bolivia know who I am. waitress--No, and I don' Carribean. Youse guys sure Armenia. Boss--Samoa your wisecracks, is it? Don't Genoa customer is always right? What's got In- dia? You think maybe this ar- guing Alps business? Customer -- Canada racket t 'Spain in the neck. Duplicate Old Lady (visiting New York Museum) --Have you a mummy of King Tut here? Attendant--No, madam. Old Lady (amazedly) -- Dear me, they have a very fine one in the British Museum. Harold--"There's the handkerchief you dropped last night, dear. I slept with it under my pillow,and I'e kiss- ed it a thousand times." Alice--"That isn't my handkerchief. That's little Fifi's sivester." RECEIVE OFFER FOR SINKING FUND IN V ESTill ENT CLASSm'rED ADS iVEBB'S SHOE REI AIRS %EAfe BEST--Dundarave.A. E. Ames Ec Co. of Vancou- ver made an offer to the coun- cil for sinking fund investment of $2,000 )Vest Vancouver 5;o bonds due 1 May, 1952, at $ 102.- 11, giving a yield of 4.85. The council accepted the offer if and when funds were available. FOR RENT--New'our Room blod- ern house. between 23rd and 24th on Kings, $ 30. Phone West 413R. IeE.iT--Furnished fiouse, July and August to reliable party Phone 9 est 629R. FOle SA LE--Barred Rock egg set- tings. Good laying strain. 1428 Esquimalt. Phone KVest 649R.le. P. Clarke 8c Co. (Vancouver) Ltd. ATTRACTIVE BUILDING LOTS- Mathers Ave., Dundsrsve, 60x120. Fully cleared, good view, $450 or offer. Esquimalt Ave., 66x100 on corner, attractive stiuation. A real good lot $360. Esquimalt Ave. 33x 120 partly cleared, bargain at $250. Your own terms. AI.TAblONT--Just built 4 room hlod- ern bungalow', fireplace and furnace, full plumbing, good lot in natural park. Agreeable situation, $3,500; terms to suit. CYI'RESS f'ARK--Attractive water- front lot with two summer camps. Lot is fully cleared and hss good roadway in rear, $ 1850, on terms. Abf BI.FSIDE--Fully modern bunga- low on paved street. Fireplace, furnace, cement floor in basement. Good view $2850, terms. GARDENS PLANNED, Lawns Rock- eries. Contract, day or hour. H. A. bfillan, West 311R1. KITCHEN CABINET and book cases made to order. Call and see speci mens Jenvey 2364 Marine Q est 346I BUILDING ALTERATIO.iS, Cement work, carpentry, etc., See Jenvey, and Dent, 2364 bfarine, West 346L. FOUNDATION, CENTI ENT % ORK Landscaping, Lama made. Gener- al Contracting. T. Bsrnott, Resid- ence Phone West 672R. IIOUSE FOIL SALE--New, bfodera. four-room house with attic, within five minutes walk of ferry. Good locality, splend:d view. Apply to Owner, P.O. Box 305, Holi@burn, or phone West 484. le. P. Clarke 8c Co. (Vancouver) Ltd 823 Hastings St. W. Sey. 7483, 7484 Local Representative C. J. ARCHEle. IVest 651L A Wf B[ ESI D E HALL Applications for reservations of the Ambleside Hall for the present may be made to the agents for the build- ing. GEO. HA Y Notary Public 1405 hfsrine Drive Phone West 21 NofeTH vhiNcoUvER ELEcTQRAL I) I ST le ICT FOR SALE -- Cleared bfarine Drive business corner, only $ 100 cash. bal- ance $900. Easy terms. Nice comfy bungalow, excellent soil, uninter- rupted view, $ 1275. terms. Five room modern house close to beach, 3 bedrooms, garage. Real snap, $2550. West Van. Investment Co. West 102. NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN that s COURT FOR THE REVISION OF THE VOTERS'IST FOR ABOVE DISTRICT iV ILL BE HELD AT MY OFFICE, 16 Lonsdale Avenue, North Vancouver, on hfonday, the 21st day of hfay, 1928, when objections to names appearing on said list, also to applications for registration, to both of which objections have already been filed, will be heard; at which also applications for registrations for reg- istration msy be made in person. AV. D. McFARLAND, Registrar of Voters, North Vancouver. FURNISHED AND UNFURNISHED SUITES FOR RENT GEO. HAY Notary Public 1405 Marine Drive. West City Office 31'ordova Street West Seymour 1260. hfODERN ELECTRIC IVIRING AND LIGHTlNG--Get our prices. Trade in your radio for new modeL North Shore Electric. Phone N. 79. SE&& I NG WANTED -- Ladies'nd Children s work Mrs Bloxham 22 i 8 Inglewood. W I.i DOIV BLIN DS--Made to order and installed. Est;mates free. Pearce's Drygoods. 14th Street and bfarine. Phone % est 144. NEWbf AN 8r. ROBBINS -- Builders and Contractors--Painting, paper- hang.ng and kalsomining, chimn.ys built. 28th and Marine. Phone West 74R1. H EM STITCH IN G--Plain white Sc yard; silk and colored 10c yard. Pearce's Drygoods, 14th Street and bfarine. Phone IVest 144. f'R SALE--Six-hole Range and Double Bed. Both in splendid con- dition Phone Nest 17SX or Rest 2 FOR SA LE--Good Lot on bfsthers Ave., between 23rd and 24th Streets size 67 ft. x 132 feet, $ 190 cash, $200 terms. Apply Troughton 4 Barrow, West 83. TO RE iT from 15th bfay--Good sum- mer camp. Large living room, bed- room kitchen double sleeping porch electric light, water phone, garage. Within few minutes of Beach, $20. KVest 651L SUbfbfER CAblP FOR RENT--Block from Beach. Phone West 496L. GARDE iS PLANNED Lawns Rock eries. Contract, day or hour. H. A Millan, West 311R1. I.OST--I'air of Boy's Horn Rimmed Glasses, near 14th and Clyde. Phone West 696L3. FOR SALE--Oil Store, 3 burner with oven. Good condition, cheap. Small Dressing Table $8; Fireless Cooker $ 10; also Fumed Oak Dining Room Suite in good condition. West 489. BEAUTIFUL LARGE BUILDI.iG Lot for sale. Garden soil. paved street. near Ferry. Your terms. West 331L. TIIE COLD WEATHER makes no dif- ference. Our stock of Running shoes is complete. Tite's Nu-Wsy Shoe Repair, Yates Building, Ambleside. ~ ~ I ~ I I I ~ ~~, I ~ Hundreds of miles of COLFIXED ROADS are giving satisfactory service throughout the world-- in Scotland, England, Ireland, Germany, Czecho-Slovakia, France, Italy, British India, Ceylon, Far East, Hong Kong, New Zealand, Australia, South Africa, Rhodesia, Kenya Colony, Malay States, Straits Settlements and South America. ADVANTAGES OF THE COLFIX PROCESS, By the cold or emulsion process, the bitumen is in such a finely divided state that the stones are not separated by any appreciable thickness of bitumen, and in consequence the aggregate after consolidation is really a solid mass of stone, each particle being cemented to its neighbor by the thinnest possible film of bitumen. The cold process for using bitumen therefore possesses many distinct advantages, a few of ivhich are:-- (1) Saving in cost of the finished road, as bitumen is not wasted. (2) The fact that the cold process road cannot become "wavy" in hot weather owing to the absence of excess bitumen. (3) The use of the most suitable grade of bitumen for road construction. (4) The use of plant or expensive machinery of all kinds, with the exception of the road roller, is eliminated. COLFIX is the result of years of scientific research on the part of Petroleum Tech- nologists of Great Britain in their endeavours to remedy the defects in the system of applying Hot Asphalt and Tar to roads. ECONOiIY Economy with efficiency is more important noiv than ever it has been. THE "COLFIX" WAY IS THE iVAY OF ECOXOiIY No time nor money lost in heating. No time lost during wet iveather. No surcharges for fuel, haulages, upkeep of plant or labour. No plant required, as the "Colfix" ivay is From the barrel or tank to the road. It is the last ivord in Bitumen as applied to road construction. USES COLFIX is used for spraying road surfaces, high grade paveing of streets. COLFIX PREMIER for asphalt, concrete, Repairing pot holes, School Playgrounds, Tennis Courts, Garden Paths. COLFIX SIDEIVALI~S can be laid so economically that the most Outlying Sections of the ~lunicipality can have this very necessary improvement. COLFIX HINDS ROADS iVITH 100',o ASI HALT. COLFIX IS BRITISH COI FIX IS A HOilE INDUSTRY COI FIX IS GUARANTEED TO GIVE SATISFACTION BY STRONG FINANCIAL INTERESTS ~ 1 1 .. ie o ix ..ac:orV is in .Ior:& ihncouver Offices 570 Dunsmuir Street, Vancouver a+