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- 3 I should also add, he said, that the village shop libraries have been particularly useful for the local children, who otherwise would not have had much access to books. The teacher was looking thoughtful. But are there no snags? he asked. No, said the shopkeeper, but two odd things have happened. In the smallest of the villages, the village shop side of the business has now closed down, leaving only the library and the post office in the premises. But in the village with just over five hundred residents the shop sales have increased, and the owner has sold the business. Apparently it was a swift sale and the new owner plans to keep the library going. The shopkeeper paused. I would like a library in my shop, he said. I think it would be good for business and good for the village. The old lady agreed. It is obvious, she said, that the Library is going to have to find a new home. There have been some daft suggestions about housing it here in the school, or in the church hall, or even in the pub. But the shop is the obvious place. It means that I could go in, draw my pension, buy my groceries and borrow my library book. Her son, the head teacher, smiled. The politicians are always going on about one-stop shops these days, mother. I think they will agree with you. (By Brian Redhead, Country Living Magazine, October 1993) TRIP TRAPS: Some things NOT to say during vacation: I can tread water indefinitely. These mushrooms are perfectly safe. If you don't bother it, it won't bother you. I don't bum, I tan. Why don't we swim all the way across? Poison ivy? I'm immune to it. Let's see what's under this rotten log. The diving board wouldn't be here if the water wasn't deep enough LAST WORDS It took only 50 years for movies to go from silent to unspeakable. Bureaucracy is the art of making the possible impossible. Children stand more in need of example than criticism. The trouble with opportunity is that it only knocks. Temptation kicks the door in. Tony Scammell Editor